Who Will Know What a Library Was?

My wife and I have been talking about school lately. We have a three year old boy and the idea that he’ll soon have to go to school is starting to creep into our minds. Well, actually, more like sky dive towards Jupiter into our minds. Kids grow up fast.

Anyway, I just found out our second choice of school (can’t afford the first, private school) has no library. An elementary school with no library. I wouldn’t be surprised now if they told me the kindergarten teacher is part-time and is supported by student-lead peer supervision.

They don’t have an art program either. My wife, who teaches art through a city program and also gives private lessons to children, has already been told she’ll be asked to volunteer her expertise. We joked about me having to be the volunteer librarian. I can see it now. I pull up in front of the school in my rusting white cavalier and step out, dressed in black, three day beard, computer bags under my eyes. I step to the trunk. A quick glance assures me there’s no penny-pinching, library hating, conservative types around. The kids gather quickly as I pull out my stash. Alligator Soup. White Fang. The Hobbit. Treasure Island. The Jungle Book. The Silver Chair. Yeah, it’s strong stuff but you have to get them hooked the first time if they’re going to come back.

This is what I get for making fun of the Library, isn’t it?

8 responses to “Who Will Know What a Library Was?”

  1. God: “Oh, so you say you don’t like libraries, Ian? TAKE THIS!” [lays a smackdown of poetic justice]

  2. Divine poetic justice will get you every time.

  3. That’s kind of a mean way to get back at you though. God should have just dropped something on your head like…a library check-out system. Plus, it would have been funny.

  4. Check out by check out. Perfect. How about Dewey Decimation? Or Li-buried?

  5. Elliot got there with my comment first. šŸ™‚

  6. Welcome to Upper Fort Stewart, Julie. Don’t think you’re going to get me past those Library Doors, though. šŸ™‚

  7. I can’t believe there are schools without libraries. What happened?
    We had a library filled with French books. Nothing but French books everywhere. We went every Monday to pick out a book (yep, only one), and we had to read that book during ‘quiet time’. This was about 10 minutes before lunch, or after lunch, or before recess, I can’t remember. Maybe it was during the teacher’s bathroom (smoke?) breaks.
    How does the teacher manage to get a break if there is no library?

  8. I think they just put on a Sponge Bob video now. Oh wait, that makes me sound old and grumpy. And here I thought the internet was going to disguise my identity,

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